All the details, including my mental health struggles during my pregnancy with my second baby. This post also includes lots of candid photos that aren’t necessarily the fanciest but are the real deal.
From my experience as a mom of two, many moms-to-be (myself included) spend their pregnancies wondering and pondering about their labour and delivery. One of the things I really enjoyed doing when I first became pregnant was reading the stories shared by the moms that came before me. I found it really helped me to feel more prepared for what to expect.
As such, I wanted to share my personal experiences too. I wrote about my first baby delivery story with Lucas here (you’ll also find my winter maternity pics there) and I’m sharing once again with the arrival of baby number two.
Especially since it, of course, didn’t go at all the way that I expected.
Many said my second baby delivery would be faster and easier. That’s a double no for me on both fronts. It wasn’t either, it was just different.
I like many moms-to-be I spent my pregnancy wondering how my labour and delivery was going to go. As such, I wanted to share my personal labour and delivery experiences too. I wrote about my first labour and delivery story here (and shared my winter maternity pics). Below I’m sharing once again with the arrival of baby number two.
Many said my second baby delivery would be faster and easier. That’s a double no for me on both fronts. It wasn’t either, it was just different.
And because I’m sure you’re wondering about the sex of my baby and why throughout this post I won’t be using one pronoun or the other, I’ll address that right off the bat.
As with my first pregnancy, we didn’t find out the sex of the baby until the big day for baby number two. But that’s where the similarities end.
My second pregnancy, labour, and baby delivery were very different which as I’ve learned, does not necessarily mean you should expect to be carrying the opposite sex!
As with my first pregnancy, we didn’t find out the sex of the baby until the big day for baby number two. But my second pregnancy, labour, and baby delivery were very different which as I’ve learned does not necessarily mean you should expect to be carrying the opposite sex!
Yay I’m Pregnant! But I’m Also So Anxious…
After I found out I was pregnant again and initial excitement had worn off, anxiety set in. My concerns mainly revolved around preeclampsia which I was diagnosed with during my first pregnancy. I lost so much sleep worrying that I would once again have preeclampsia and had so much anxiety around it that I sought out counselling (which I spoke about in this video).
It was during these sessions that I learned about pregnancy anxiety, which I hadn’t previously heard of. Much like prenatal anxiety and depression, pregnancy anxiety can rear its ugly head in circumstances like mine. It wasn’t until about 5 months into my pregnancy that I felt I really got a handle on it and was able to sleep again (I shared the strategies as to how I went about that in this blog post).
Much like prenatal anxiety and depression, pregnancy anxiety can rear its ugly head in circumstances like mine. It wasn’t until about 5 months into my pregnancy that I felt I really got a handle on it and was able to sleep again (I shared the strategies as to how I went about that in this blog post).
Otherwise, I had a relatively smooth pregnancy. Some morning sickness this time around that I didn’t experience the first time, but luckily no complications.
My doctor prescribed low-dose Aspirin throughout the majority of my second pregnancy as a preventative measure and suffice it to say this appears to have helped. My pregnancy with my first baby ended at 38 weeks 3 days when I was induced after being diagnosed with preeclampsia.
This time, I made it to the 40-week finish line. Forty weeks with no abnormal headaches, complications, and stable blood pressure. It was a huge relief to not be diagnosed with preeclampsia again and have no reason to be induced with baby two.
I Made it to 40 Weeks, Now What?
As much as I tried to enjoy my glorious big baby bump before it was gone, a few days past the 40-week mark I found myself feeling antsy and asking my Instagram followers for their tips and tricks for inducing labour (which they provided in the comments spades). But like all babies, this one was determined to arrive on his/her own schedule. As they say, when they’re ready, they will come.
I tried all the tricks for inducing labour, but like all babies, this one was determined to arrive on his/her own schedule. As they say, when they’re ready, they will come.
The Latent Phase: Is Something Happening? Or Not Yet?
At 40 weeks and 5 long days, I felt that perhaps all of my bouncing around on a giant exercise ball was finally starting to pay off. I felt contractions sporadically and shared my excitement via this belly bump photo. Things were happening! So far the contractions felt tolerable and were sporadic. They’d come for a few hours, and go for a few more, which is consistent with the latent phase of labour. So I kept bouncing and tried to be as patient as a very pregnant lady can be.
As happy as I was that things were moving along, as it turns out, I had at least another 24 hours of latent labour before things really started getting serious.
Left: I truthfully took this photo just for myself after making this video about my weight. At 39 weeks, I was damn impressed with the size of this bump and based on the questions I was served about it, so was everyone else.
Finally, Signs of Early Labour
I woke up around midnight the following night thinking I was experiencing more early contractions, just as I had been for more than 24 hours at this point. After about an hour of tossing and turning, I decided to get out of bed and grab my phone to time them with the app I had downloaded as they were strong enough that I couldn’t get back to sleep.
My contractions were still more than 10-15 minutes apart, but they were finally consistent, lasting hours into the night. I relocated to my exercise ball, turned on Netflix, did some online shopping (typical), and timed away as the hours went by. By 4am my husband came looking for me in a sleepy panic, wondering if he needed to chug some coffee and get the hospital bag into the car, but not much had changed. Other than growing increasingly tired, my contractions weren’t growing closer together, but at least they weren’t stopping!
By 4am my husband came looking for me in a sleepy panic, wondering if he needed to chug some coffee and get the hospital bag into the car.
As the day went on, I continued to time my contractions as they came closer together and grew in intensity. But it wasn’t by any means quick. I think TV shows and movies make it seem as though once the contractions start, that baby will be arriving in no time. Although that may be the case for some, that certainly wasn’t my experience.
I think TV shows and movies make it seem as though once the contractions start, that baby will be arriving in no time. Although that may be the case for some, that certainly wasn’t my experience.
It was mid-afternoon when we opted to call my mom-in-law over to be with my toddler, hoping that my contractions would be at the 5-1-1 mark soon (5 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute in length, for one hour). Slowly but surely, things were progressing.
Start The Car, But Let Me Cry it out First
Around 4pm we had decided that things were moving along quickly enough that it was time to head out to the hospital, and let’s be honest. I was pretty damn impatient by this point.
But leaving the house wasn’t easy.
My toddler son Lucas (age 2.2 at this point), who we had talked to endlessly about this day completely lost it at the sight of his mom and dad heading out the door. He knew where we were going and was used to spending time with his grandma, but once the moment arrived he (apparently) wasn’t prepared for it.
He turned on the full waterworks, and this very pregnant and literally in labour mama followed suit.
So there I was, crouched to comfort my first baby, crying along with him in my full-hormonal glory while my second was actively arriving.
So there I was, crouched to comfort my first baby, crying along with him in my full-hormonal glory while my second was actively arriving.
It was at that moment that I realized it would be our very last as a family of three. That we would be coming home with a baby, and that things would be forever changed. It hadn’t fully dawned on me until then, so perhaps my toddler felt the same way.
At that moment I realized that it would be our very last as a family of three. That we would be coming home with a baby, and that things would be forever changed. It hadn’t fully dawned on me until then, so perhaps my toddler felt the same way.
Put Your Face Mask on, We’re Having a Baby
We arrived at our local hospital around 4pm that afternoon. My husband scurried to park the car while I entered with my mask on and underwent the COVID-19 screening process.
I couldn’t help but chuckle as they asked why I was there “um because there’s a human actively coming out of my body, help me please and thank you.”
I was offered a wheelchair as I waited for hubby to catch up, and the security guard and I had laughed as we watched my husband attempt to dawn his provided hospital-grade mask. He put it on upside down and then backwards before finally getting it right. I think it’s safe to say he was a tad bit flustered.
I couldn’t help but chuckle as they asked why I was there “um because there’s a human actively coming out of my body, help me please and thank you.”
The hospital security guard and I laughed as we watched my husband attempt to dawn his provided hospital-grade mask. He put it on upside down and then backwards before finally getting it right. I think it’s safe to say he was a tad bit flustered.
My husband wheeled me to the labour and delivery floor so fast you’d swear we were in the final lap of a Formula 1 race. There, I was taken into a delivery room alone to be evaluated. My husband couldn’t come along. He was asked to hang back in the waiting room due to COVID restrictions. I knew this would be the case, having been pregnant in a pandemic with an awareness that I would also be delivering a baby in one, but it was still odd to be separated, even if only temporarily.
He wheeled me to the labour and delivery floor so fast you’d swear we were in the final lap of a Formula 1 race. I was taken into a delivery room alone to be evaluated. My husband was asked to hang back in the waiting room due to COVID restrictions until I was officially admitted.
The nurse advised that I was 3cm dilated, which both excited and disappointed me. I had hoped that I was a little farther along considering I was already in latent labour for what felt like ages. But, I was happy to be officially admitted. At this point, my husband was able to join me and stay by my side and we knew that this was it. We would be leaving with a baby in tow.
Once admitted my husband was able to join me and stay by my side and we knew that this was it. We would be leaving with a baby in tow.
Just a Typical Woman in Labour
As the hours ticked by and my contractions grew in intensity, I was relieved to know that I had all of the options available to me.
In addition to the hospital bed, my delivery room had a shower, exercise ball, and even a massive birthing tub. At first, I opted for the exercise ball since I was obviously well acquainted with it. I had been bouncing for days and it was my new happy place. As I bounced and breathed, Tara, my phenomenal nurse walked into the room. Little did I know that she would become the most valuable resource to me, beyond any bath, bed, or ball.
As I bounced and breathed, Tara, my phenomenal nurse, walked into the room. Little did I know that she would become the most valuable resource to me, beyond any bath, bed, or ball.
After chatting with her about my birth plan (which was to listen to the expertise of the medical professionals and make decisions as they came) she clearly understood my desire to ideally have a natural childbirth. Tara suggested we fill the birthing tub as my contractions quickly intensified. I was skeptical at first but considering her expertise, I took her word for it.
I will forever recommend a birthing tub to any pregnant woman who asks. Whether you’re bringing one into your home or hoping to utilize one at the hospital, they’re magical. I called that tub my new home for the next few hours, distracting myself with popsicles in between contractions that felt like they were getting stronger by the second.
When that first contraction hit while I was submerged belly-deep in water, I became a believer. Hallelujah! The warmth of the water was so soothing, the weight of my belly lightened. I will forever recommend a birthing tub to any pregnant woman who asks, whether you’re bringing one into your home or hoping to utilize one at the hospital, they’re magical. I called that tub my new home for the next few hours, distracting myself with popsicles in between contractions that felt like they were getting stronger by the second.
When Things Don’t Go According to Plan…
As any woman in labour will tell you, things rarely go according to plan.
It was early evening by this point, around 6 or 7pm. Up until now, things were going smoothly and it appeared as though I may have a baby before the day was done. I continued to work through each contraction while submerged in water, but somewhere along the way things took a turn.
Things rarely go according to plan. Just when we thought this baby delivery would proove speedier than my first, things took a turn for the worst.
Suddenly, it felt as though the baby was beginning to bear down with increasing intensity, but not in the intended way.
The pain had shifted to my lower back, a feeling I was unfortunately familiar with. I had experienced back labour during my first baby delivery as well and was obviously not pleased to be reacquainted with this feeling. Tara suggested that she check my cervix once again to help determine the next steps, but I had only dilated to about 5cm after hours of getting significantly wrinkly in the tub.
After getting significantly wrinkly in the tub, I still had only dialated to 5cm and the back labour was excruciating. We had to readjust our plan, and our expectations.
Well, I Didn’t Miss This Feeling
The birthing tub was no longer doing the trick in terms of helping me cope with the pain. I got out and leaned over the hospital bed in tears with searing pain in my back and exhaustion written all over my face.
As midnight rolled around it was clear that I would not be having this baby as quickly as we thought. I had now been awake for 24 hours straight. So tired, and still no baby.
Midnight arrived and still no baby. I had now been awake for 24 hours straight and was absolutely exhausted.
I tried to get through it by changing positions, contorting myself every which way while Tara and my husband traded off applying counterpressure to my lower back. Tara brought my beloved bouncy ball into the shower and sprayed water on my back while I attempted to bounce through the pain for a little while.
But when I had only dilated another centimetre and still had 4 more to go, it was time to consider pain relief. I needed to rest if I was going to push this baby out successfully.
It was time to bring in the big guns.
Glory, Glory, Epidural
I wasn’t keen on getting the epidural again as I recalled it made it difficult for me to lift my legs and push during my first delivery. But I knew I had no choice. I needed sleep. It was the middle of the night at this point and I had been awake so long I wasn’t able to cope with the pain. I was a crying mess. I craved sleep so very badly, and the back labour wasn’t providing much of a break between contractions.
I knew I had no choice. I needed sleep. It was the middle of the night at this point and I had been awake so long I wasn’t able to cope with the pain. I was a crying mess. I craved sleep so very badly, and the back labour wasn’t providing much of a break between contractions.
Once I had decided that getting an epidural was the route I wanted to take, the anesthesiologist couldn’t get there fast enough. I couldn’t wait for the epidural to work. But before that could happen I had to sit very still through my contractions while it was administered, which was no easy feat. Tara pushed down on my shoulders to help keep me still and took deep breaths by my side. Before I knew it, it was done and I was able to finally lie down and close my eyes. I could still feel the contractions, but my desire to sleep proved stronger than the pain.
Before I knew it, it was done and I was able to finally lie down and close my eyes. I could still feel the contractions, but my desire to sleep proved stronger than the pain.
The Waiting Game Begins Continues
My husband got comfy on the cot (well, as comfy as you can get in one of those things) and we both tried to get some sleep while my cervix hopefully dilated to 10cm. I slept as well as can be expected while hooked up and regularly monitored, but I can’t complain. The epidural had worked its magic and I could only mildly feel the contractions in my back. It was far better than the alternative!
After a few hours of sleep, the sun was beginning to rise and I felt as though I was ready to push. I had finally fully dilated and felt rested enough to deliver this baby!
Alright, baby. Let’s freaking do this.
Roll The Mirror a Little to the Left
Getting to this point took days, but when the moment finally arrived it was only 20 minutes in the making. After pushing with my first baby for 2.5 hours, this part of my delivery was a relief.
After pushing with my first baby for 2.5 hours, this part of my delivery was a relief.
I gotta tell you, what I believe really helped to expedite the pushing stage was the use of a mirror. Now you might be cringing at the thought of using a mirror during delivery to see everything that’s going on between your legs (I wasn’t sure I wanted to get this up close and personal with myself either), but hear me out.
I gotta tell you, what I believe really helped to expedite the pushing stage was the use of a mirror. You might be cringing at the thought of using a mirror during delivery to see everything that’s going on, but that mirror helped immensely. I was able to see what was happening, even if I couldn’t feel everything as much as I would have without the epidural.
The mirror counteracted the effects of the epidural in the sense that I was able to negate the fact that I still felt numb by seeing what was happening. Tara had suggested I use the mirror after hearing me say that I found it hard to be in tune with my body and know when to push. The mirror solved that problem because I was able to see it, even if I couldn’t feel everything as much as I would have without the epidural. It was the best of both worlds, pain relief without sacrificing the sensation.
And you know what, that mirror also allowed me to feel a great deal of pride. I was able to see what my body was able to do, and it filled me with immense awe and appreciation for what my body is capable of.
That mirror also allowed me to feel a great deal of pride. I was able to see what my body was able to do, and it filled me with immense awe and appreciation for what my body is capable of.
But I’m not going to lie, I also felt relief. Seeing that baby arrive right before my very eyes after carrying it and feeling its every move inside me for nine long months was indescribably rewarding.
Welcome Baby Ruck (again)
And that’s how Jacob arrived. Born at 6:25am on April 19th, 2021 at 41 weeks exactly, even though I was sure he was going to arrive days earlier. Perhaps he just needed that extra time to grow to a whopping 9 pounds, 2 ounces (that’s two whole 2 pounds bigger than his big brother).
When my doctor realized the size of this baby, it became pretty obvious that kiddo just didn’t have a whole lotta wiggle room to wiggle out of me (lol). But like any mother post-labour will tell you, it was all totally worth it.
Anna
P.S. Have any questions about my experience? Feel free to ask away in the comment section below and I’ll be sure to answer.
I’d love to hear about your labour and delivery experiences too! And if you prefer, you can connect with me on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. I would be happy to chat babies with you!
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